Author: Sam Ruland

Bryce Harper’s toothpaste technique: C

Bryce Harper spent last week defending his toothbrushing technique after the internet discovered that he squeezes toothpaste directly into his mouth.

The revelation was so unsettling that the Padres put it on the videoboard, dentists weighed in, and millions of people suddenly found themselves evaluating the oral hygiene habits of the Phillies’ first baseman.

The funniest part is that Harper seemed genuinely confused by the backlash. “I’ve done it forever,” he said, which somehow makes it worse.

What elevates this from ordinary internet nonsense to a true Philly sports story is that Harper is currently one of the best players in baseball, and yet this became a legitimate multiday discussion.

For the record, dentists do not recommend the technique. But Harper has two MVPs, hundreds of home runs, and apparently very clean teeth, so hard to argue with the results.

Three Philly-area contestants on ‘Love Island’? The Eagles agenda is spreading: B+

Three contestants with Philadelphia-region ties entered the villa on this season of Love Island USA. They are a North Philly native, a Cape May track star, and a former Lehigh Valley police officer.

And within one episode, Philadelphia had already established diplomatic relations.

North Philly’s Melanie Moreno and Cape May’s Sincere Rhea immediately bonded over the Eagles, with Moreno declaring, “Literally cut me and I’ll bleed green.”

The funniest part about Philly representation on reality TV is that contestants from here almost never ease people into it. Within minutes, viewers knew Moreno was from Philadelphia because she announced it the same way most Philadelphians do: loudly and with complete confidence.

Meanwhile, Rhea seems genuinely wholesome enough that the producers will almost certainly try to create problems for him by Episode 3.

The real winner, though, may be Philadelphia itself. The city somehow landed three contestants on one of the biggest reality shows, ensuring that for at least the next few weeks, viewers will get Eagles fandom and blunt honesty on their screens.

Philly restaurants keep collecting national awards like it’s normal now: A

Two Philadelphia restaurants landed on North America’s 50 Best Restaurants list this week, with Kalaya and Friday Saturday Sunday once again earning spots among the continent’s culinary heavyweights.

The funny thing is that Philly food fans have become almost spoiled by this stuff.

A few years ago, getting one restaurant on a list like this would have triggered a citywide victory lap. Now the reaction is more along the lines of: “Only two? What happened to Royal Sushi?”

To be fair, both restaurants dropped in the rankings this year. But they also remained on a list featuring just 50 restaurants across the United States and Canada, which is a pretty good reminder of how much Philly’s dining scene has changed.

Not that long ago, national restaurant conversations about Philadelphia basically began and ended with cheesesteaks.

Now we’re arguing about Michelin recommendations, international rankings, tasting menus, and whether a restaurant fell from 7th to 11th … that’s a good problem to have.

Philadelphia gave Martha Graham Cracker a fitting farewell: A+

The death of Martha Graham Cracker creator Dito van Reigersberg this week felt less like the loss of a performer and more like the loss of a piece of Philadelphia itself.

The tributes poured in from every corner of the city — theater, music, drag, dance, politics — which says a lot about the rare place he occupied in Philadelphia culture.

But one detail from the obituary stood out. David Devan, the former head of Opera Philadelphia, was at the hospital when van Reigersberg died June 1, the first day of Pride Month. Leaving afterward, he watched the city’s Pride rainbow lights come on across Philadelphia.

“It was the first day of Pride Month, and our greatest queer Philadelphian died,” Devan said.

For a performer who spent decades making people laugh, feel welcome, and feel seen, it’s difficult to imagine a more fitting image than Philadelphia lighting up in rainbows on the night he died.

The Nick Castellanos reunion tour lasted about as long as expected: C

When Nick Castellanos returned to Citizens Bank Park this week, the Phillies played a scoreboard tribute featuring some of his memorable moments from the 2022 postseason. Twenty-four hours later, the Padres designated him for assignment. The timing was brutal.

Castellanos hit .191 in a part-time role with San Diego after the Phillies released him in spring training. Still, there’s something oddly fitting about the whole thing happening in Philadelphia.

For all the frustration that came with the final year of the Castellanos era, he was also part of some genuinely great Phillies moments: The standing ovations, the postseason homers, the absolute certainty that if something weird happened in a game, Castellanos would somehow be involved.

Now, he’s looking for another opportunity at age 34. And if this is the end of the road, at least Philadelphia got one last chance to tip its cap before the baseball gods immediately delivered one final, extremely Nick Castellanos plot twist.

Philly movie fans lose again: F

Philadelphia moviegoers got some bad news this week when Apple Cinemas scrapped plans to reopen the former Riverview Plaza theater in South Philly, ending hopes for the return of one of the city’s most beloved moviegoing spots, reported PhillyVoice.

And what makes it sting is that people were genuinely excited about this one.

The plan included bringing movies back to a theater that’s been dark since 2020, adding an IMAX screen, and giving Philly something it currently doesn’t have: a true IMAX theater. Instead, the project collapsed amid a dispute between Apple Cinemas and property owner Bart Blatstein over the condition of the building and lease obligations.

The result is that the giant empty theater remains a giant empty theater.

Cristopher Sánchez is running out of Phillies records to break: A+

A week after setting the Phillies franchise record for consecutive scoreless innings, Cristopher Sánchez added another one: the longest scoreless streak ever by a left-handed pitcher.

That’s not just a Phillies record. That’s an MLB record.

By reaching 45⅔ scoreless innings, Sánchez passed Hall of Famer Carl Hubbell and moved into sixth place on the all-time list, regardless of handedness.

What’s remarkable is how quickly this has gone from surprising to expected.

Bryce Harper probably summed it up best when he said it feels normal now. A pitcher is doing things that haven’t been done in generations, and the reaction has become, “Yep, that’s Sánchez.” A few nervous moments, a bunch of awkward swings at changeups, seven scoreless innings, and another historic number attached to his name.

The streak will end eventually, but right now, Philadelphia is watching one of the best stretches of pitching in baseball history unfold every fifth day.